Sunday, May 3, 2009

Hi again

"There will come a time when you believe everything is finished. Yet that will be the beginning."

My friend (Pam) has inspired me to start blogging again.  I'm thinking this blog will take a different form now.  Maybe more short posts.  More snippets of what I am thinking and feeling.  Twitter-ish?  I'm not going to try to be as entertaining.  We shall see how it evolves.

Pam posted this quote to her blog today.  Lately, I have been looking at my kids and thinking about how old they are.  I know it's relative.  Pam's kids are in high school and college and they seem old to her.  But my oldest just turned 8 and I am feeling like time is slipping through my fingers.   I remember his first days at home - rocking him in the rocker, 24/7, nursing him, staring at him, breathing him in.  It seems like a blink ago but also somehow far away.  The memories are there, but they are a little foggy.  If I reach out for them, I can almost touch them.  But not quite.  I am terrified that the next 8 years will go by as quickly.

Underneath the feelings I have watching my children grow, is the underlying question of who I am.  Before I became a mom, I knew the answer to that question.  But I'm not that person any more.  I don't know the answer anymore.  And so as my children grow, there are endings, which are also beginnings.  


Pam said...

So glad we are on the path together and sooo glad you are blogging again. You might not be in touch with who you are at the moment, but you have a real and true voice. Love you!

Pamela said...

PS" Get it. PaMELa

Pamela said...

OK - I was concentrating on the hint so much that my grammar is completely incorrect.
PS: Get it? PaMELa.
So much for sublety.